I have a forever friend that keeps me real. She tells me exactly what she thinks and she doesn't keep it soft and safe. That is a very good thing. I need that. In fact, I think we all need that at times. It isn't always easy to hear, and sometimes it hurts - a lot! But I know that what she says is meant with the very best intentions and even if she's angry when she says it, I can count on it being the truth as she sees it. She knows that I too will confront her with the truth as I see it when I know it is what she needs to hear. That is a good friend, a great friend as a matter of a fact.
Jesus was that kind of friend. He had so many men around him at any given moment that He could very easily have tired of being a good friend. He never seemed to get a moments peace and yet, He was never cross or impatient when these fellows asked Him some of the most inane questions. He didn't shy away from the hard answer for fear of being disliked. He didn't speak in parables so as to not offend the ignorant, He never lied, and He didn't hesitate with the truth. He is the best example of being a great friend I can think of.
Jesus didn't pull any punches. He didn't hesitate when the man attempting to find a loophole in the "love thy neighbor" command asked for a definition of the word neighbor (Luke 10:29). Jesus readily tackled that subversive behavior by telling the man that even those lowly Samaritans were his neighbors. To a Jew that was the most insulting and humiliating answer he could have received. As a result the man was quieted and one of the best examples of neighbor was born and used the world over.
Jesus didn't pull punches when he advised the rich man on the greatest commandments. The wealthy man assured the Savior that he was doing all that, was there anything else he needed to do to get to heaven (Matthew 19:16-23)? Jesus cut to the heart of the mans entire existence when he then advised him to give away all his material wealth and follow Him. Notice the fact that the man walked away saddened. That was more than he was willing to do and Christ knew it. It didn't keep Jesus from telling him the truth, however. It very likely saddened our Savior, but He didn't dumb down or soften the requirement. He tells it like it is.
Even around the fire on one of His last nights with his closest friends, Christ drove right to the heart of the matter without hesitation. Three times he asks Peter, "Do you love me?" and three times he tells Peter to look after the church He would be leaving behind (John 21:15-22). At the end of this unusual discussion, Peter is a bit hurt and probably had a stinging wound in his pride. When Jesus drops the bomb on Peter that his days would end in a not so pleasant manner it seems to be the breaking point for the first true church leader. Peter looks around in consternation and his gaze lights on John. "What about him?" you can almost hear the petulant whine. It's as if he's looking for solace in knowing someone else will suffer too. Christ is unswerving in his answer, "If I choose to let him live forever, that's none of your business. You do what I have told you to!".
Peter was no doubt a great friend and companion to Jesus, yet there isn't any room for a light hand when it comes to the important issues they were facing. The same should be true with us. When people in our lives matter, we shouldn't take a light approach in our dealings with them, even if it means it might hurt feelings or be steeped in uncomfortable silence. The truth, when applied with kindness and necessity, is always the right answer.
Don't get me wrong. Rudeness is never an acceptable approach and isn't excusable disguised in truth. When in doubt about how to say what desperately needs said, PRAY! The Holy Spirit has never let me down with lending me his vocabulary when I can't seem to find the right words. And if I'm not finding words, maybe what I am trying to say needn't be said at all. The proverb that tells us a wise man holds his tongue is very good advise indeed (Proverbs 21:23). You may not know the right answer, but you don't have to seal the deal on how much you don't know by proving it with saying the wrong thing.
Is there something you've been needing to say to a friend that has you hesitating? Pray now that God will guide your steps and give you the courage and the words to get HIS point across
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